Recently Red Bridge’s missionary family to Germany visited us.  After speaking on Sunday they showed pictures set to a Zoe Group song.  The song could have been written solely for me.

We are not afraid, to follow where You lead, Leaving what we know, for what we cannot see. We are not afraid for we are not alone, and so we’ll go with You into the unknown.

I am a creature of habit.  I feed my beloved family with regular trips to Aldi.  I fund my children’s education through the public library.  I speak English at home and out.  I don’t even like moving across town, and change of any kind is hard for me.  I cried when I heard these words.

We are not afraid to love the way You do, to serve with the same grace we receive from You.  We are not afraid to look beyond ourselves, and offer hope to those who cannot help themselves.

Can I give up my comfortable life to share eternity with people who don’t know the truth about Jesus?  I cried some more.

We are not afraid though some say we should wait, the cost is just too high, the danger is too great.  We are not afraid to move when You say move,   Trusting in Your voice, We will follow You.

I’ve met people who have a hard time understanding why we would leave the country with young children, almost as if they think they love my children more than I do, more than the God who would ask me to go.  I scored 100% on harm avoidance in one of Team Expansion’s psychologist’s tests, so safety is very important to me too.  But He has asked me to move, and I cried even more.

We will be fearless for You.  Fearless for You.  We will be faithful in all that we do.  If we step out on the waves or walk through the flames, Whatever you ask us to do, we will be fearless for You.

But do I feel fearless?  Not so much.  I’m not sure I have to be completely fearless, but I am determined to walk through the fear and do it anyway.  These days fear doesn’t haunt me nearly so much as it did before, but I still need to have faith that He will be with me, that I’m not alone.

When I’m alone with this song, I practically shout those words to Him.  I want so desperately to be fearless for Him.  But in the meantime I’ll have to settle for trusting Him to help me through the fears.