Fear & Trust

Fearless – by Elizabeth

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Recently Red Bridge’s missionary family to Germany visited us.  After speaking on Sunday they showed pictures set to a Zoe Group song.  The song could have been written solely for me.

We are not afraid, to follow where You lead, Leaving what we know, for what we cannot see. We are not afraid for we are not alone, and so we’ll go with You into the unknown.

I am a creature of habit.  I feed my beloved family with regular trips to Aldi.  I fund my children’s education through the public library.  I speak English at home and out.  I don’t even like moving across town, and change of any kind is hard for me.  I cried when I heard these words.

We are not afraid to love the way You do, to serve with the same grace we receive from You.  We are not afraid to look beyond ourselves, and offer hope to those who cannot help themselves.

Can I give up my comfortable life to share eternity with people who don’t know the truth about Jesus?  I cried some more.

We are not afraid though some say we should wait, the cost is just too high, the danger is too great.  We are not afraid to move when You say move,   Trusting in Your voice, We will follow You.

I’ve met people who have a hard time understanding why we would leave the country with young children, almost as if they think they love my children more than I do, more than the God who would ask me to go.  I scored 100% on harm avoidance in one of Team Expansion’s psychologist’s tests, so safety is very important to me too.  But He has asked me to move, and I cried even more.

We will be fearless for You.  Fearless for You.  We will be faithful in all that we do.  If we step out on the waves or walk through the flames, Whatever you ask us to do, we will be fearless for You.

But do I feel fearless?  Not so much.  I’m not sure I have to be completely fearless, but I am determined to walk through the fear and do it anyway.  These days fear doesn’t haunt me nearly so much as it did before, but I still need to have faith that He will be with me, that I’m not alone.

When I’m alone with this song, I practically shout those words to Him.  I want so desperately to be fearless for Him.  But in the meantime I’ll have to settle for trusting Him to help me through the fears.

Follow Close – The Song

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For the last year or so, God has really been opening up our eyes about the theme of simply following.  Trusting him enough to follow him.  So we’re moving to Asia.  🙂

As I’ve mentioned before, God used Psalm 63, among other things, to push us into this whole mission adventure thing.  We wrote a song based on that Psalm, and it has been such a blessing and comfort to us.  We humbly share it with you now.  (One cool note: this version was recorded one evening during my trip to Cambodia this past February.  The night sounds of Phnom Penh can be heard in the background, and the commentators are Chris and Casey Allison.)

May we all have the courage to follow close, wherever He leads.

Why Go? (some thoughts from Elizabeth)

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“Break my heart for what breaks Yours, Everything I am for Your Kingdom’s cause.” Hillsong’s Hosanna brought me to tears this week (even before Doug Lucas quoted the words). I listened to the song over and over. That’s because I am in a place where I am indeed giving everything for His Kingdom’s cause. Over the last few years I have been reluctantly following along in this whole missionary future. I knew it was probably the right thing, but I didn’t really want to do it. As a result I didn’t hear much from God, and I felt dry.

After Jonathan traveled to Cambodia for our initial survey trip, I was excited. He did awesome recon work and answered my questions about how we could live as a family in a 4th world country. Then, when we set a departure date I got cold feet – so much so that we considered calling off the whole thing. We went to our elders and parents and those at Team Expansion for prayer and counsel and took time off to re-examine our call. I really listened to God’s voice, not just Jonathan’s voice. I came out of that time knowing positively that yes, going to Cambodia is God’s plan for our family, not just Jonathan’s crazy idea to save the world. Before, I had felt pressure to go, but not any longer. I had peace and knew God would be with me when I left America.

Since that time, I no longer feel God is silent. I have been able to enjoy worship music again. And it was in that personal revival that I heard Hosanna. I resonated with the idea that I was giving everything, my whole life here in America, for His Kingdom’s cause. I may not be the primary evangelist for our team in Southeast Asia, but I will be serving God with everything I have and supporting the cause of Christ wholeheartedly.

On Being Safe, by Elizabeth

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When Jonathan stepped off the plane from Cambodia I gave him the Phil Wickham CD Heaven and Earth. It is such a treasure. In fact, the 6th song on the album, Safe, helped me say YES to overseas missions. It echoed something Wendy Gibson, one of our Team Expansion coaches, told me: I can trust God to be with me across the ocean. The chorus sings: “You will be safe in His arms, the hands that hold the world are holding your heart. This is the promise He made, He will be with you always, when everything is falling apart you will be safe in His arms.” Those words gave and give me comfort in knowing God is always with me, wherever I am. Somehow I had forgotten. Phil and Wendy reminded me.